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Posts Tagged ‘shopping’
Can’t get enough…Underwear?
Date Added: July 31st, 2008
You know how every girl absolutely LOVES shopping? Especially with her girlfriends right? Oh, believe me I did. Up until when this happened…ugh…
A week before my freshman year starts. Crossroads mall. Shopping with friends for clothes. About 4 hours in. (Oh yea [= AND we were still kickin it! lol) At that point we had pretty much wiped out the entire mall…haha…but we had one store left that had a HUGE sale going on, we were in desperate need of underwear, and me and my friends all wanted some…Victoria’s Secret.
This is the point where I must tell you how…childish??…my friends were. They couldn’t say the word v-string without turning into a tomato. I was THE ONLY ONE that could say ‘ DANG! This thong’s a MIGHTY bit snug. ‘ without falling over in embarrassment.
SOO, after a little bit of giggle fits, we braved past the ladies at the door, and with me leading the way, headed to the sale bins. I was the first to jump in. Heck, I love their thongs! [= lol It took them a while, but they FINALLY stuck their hands into the pile of granny-panties. ( And yes I SWEAR i tried to convince them to try some thongs…believe me i felt like a failure as a friend.) lol
About 20 minutes later we were set to get in line. Panties in hand. ( Mind you, we each had about 10 each…) We even had the coolest gay guy as our clerk. Sweet Right??
Now here’s the kicker……Remember how my friends are like SHY to the max? Well, Morgan walks up and says, ‘ Lexiiiiii…..If we give you the money do you think you could…ummm….’
OH YEA you guessed it right! THEY wanted ME to go up and BUY THEIR UNDERWEAR FOR THEM………….dear god……….
Now I’m a helpful and kind friend, which pretty much means i am easy to take advantage of…so of course, i gave in.
SOOO there i was….
standing in line with about $120 worth of clearance underwear in my hands……..
YEEPPPP.
THAT was juuuussttt GRAND.
OK so i FINALLY got up to the register….past all the people in the other lines looking at me thinking ‘ And WHERE is that Girls MOTHER…uh!…that is just SO wrong!’
I drop the truck load of panties on the counter………MEANWHILE my friends AREN’T EVEN IN THE STORE!
Gay guy looks at me with that knowing look only a gay guy can give………………
“Honey……” “Abstinence is the best way for a girl your age.”
OH MY GOSH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DID I HONESTLY JUST HERE THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!
oooOOOOhhhHHHHH boOOYYYYY!
Well that’s when i went into panic mode and started telling him that i was buying these for my friends too and not just me. NOPE. I’m innocent. I SWEAR!!!
…….he just laughed his head off…..
I was humiliated that day.
I was accused of sleeping around by a gay guy…lol
Oh…and i have a receipt for 45 pairs of underwear.
It’s in a scrapbook. If that isn’t a chicken pucker moment, i don’t know what is.
Lex from Lawrence, Mi
My kid will never be like that!
Date Added: March 19th, 2008
Before I had a child, I did that thing that everyone does before they
have a child — I saw a child behaving a certain way in public and
said something to myself about how MY kid would never be like that.
Well, of course, then I had kids … My 2 year old is kind of in an
emotional phase right now: too little to do most things, and thinks
she’s too big to not do them herself. Her new favorite trick to play
on me is to lay down where ever she is to try and get her way. One
day, we were coming out of a Target, and she wanted some food item
that we had bought. I told her “No, it is going in the trunk and you
can have it when we got home.” With this, she laid down right in the
parking lot … and right in a puddle. At this point, I didn’t really
want to pick her up because she was sopping wet and I was trying to
get our items into my trunk. So there she was, in a puddle, with
people walking by and staring at her. Several people even stopped to
ask if we were okay, or if I needed some help. But I was determined
to win this battle of the wills, so I refused to pick her up.
Wouldn’t you know, my stubborn child lay in the puddle in that Target
parking lot for OVER 30 MINUTES while several well-meaning people
offered me help (much to my embarrassment). When she finally gave up,
she stood up, helped me get her clothes off, went right into her car
seat and we went home — like nothing had even happened!
-Nicole from Cali
Do you even work here?
Date Added: February 3rd, 2008
I had finally decided to bite the bullet. I was going to buy an expensive bra instead of the cheap Fruit of the Loom I typically purchase. So as I walked into Frederick’s of Hollywood, I was instantly greeted by an older lady who sounded like she smoked three packs a day. She kindly pointed me in the direction of the bras, asked me my size. Without regard to color I was handed two bras and ushered off to the dressing room. Being a newbe and not wanting to look like an idiot, I went along quietly…too quietly. After only a couple of minutes, she hollered in to see if I was getting along OK with the bra. I replied I didn’t think the bra fit. Before I knew what was happening, she was in the dressing room with me! She told me I was putting the bra on all wrong. Next thing I know, she had a hold of my breast and was “dropping” it into the bra. Thank God she at least asked me if I could handle doing the other one!!
I pulled myself together and headed up to the register to pay for the bra, wanting nothing more than to flee. Thinking they worked on commission, I tell the girl that the older lady helped me. This is where things get worse. The girl proceeds to tell me that no one over twenty-five works there!!! OH MY GOD! I probably was helped by the older lady that likes to help helpless women like me… if you know what I mean! Come to think of it… I didn’t see a name tag on that women with cold hands either!
Oops… I did buy two!!
Date Added: January 29th, 2008
As a grandmother, I love spending time with my kids and grand-kids. One day I was shopping with my daughter and 3 year old grand-daughter. My plan was to just spend some quality time with my daughter and take her birthday shopping. Well, as parents we know how the best laid plans go….her babysitter situation fell through. So there we were shopping at Bed, Bath and Beyond. Our hopes were of getting her some sheets, a mattress heating pad and some other accessories for her bedroom. You know how easy it is to get distracted in that store… well she was preoccupied with this chopping gadget. I was eager to make our purchases and told her, “Sure I’ll get you one of those.” We continued on picking up all her new stuff for her bedroom, and realized her oldest daughter would be out of basketball soon. We had to rush and pay for our stuff. Now, at this point the 3 year old has had enough of shopping and was starting to do the checkout whine. You know the one… whine for candy, whine for in the cart, whine for outof the cart. As the cashier is ringing us up, my heart starts to do the buyers remorse at how much we spent. Walking out to the car I check out the receipt. There is no way I spent that much. Whew… I see one problem. They rang me up for two of those chopping doo hickeys. I let my daughter load her car with the goodies and sent her on her way, as I go back in to rectify the situation. I saunter up to the counter and tell the nice young man that my receipt is wrong. I didn’t buy two of the choppers. He calmly replies, ” Yes, you did ma’am.” I repeat, “No I didn’t. What would I need two of those for?” Well, with his eyes rolling, the young man took one off of my bill. I am feeling a little better. Until….. My daughter gets home and unpacks the goods. She calls to tell me that, yes we did buy two of the choppers. In our haste we both had put one in the cart! Now I have to go back this weekend (with my tail between my legs) and repay for that darn chopper! Or try and take one back… I don’t know what to do!! What a chicken pucker situation this is!! -Andie, Paw Paw, MI.
Just hold it
Date Added: December 29th, 2007
This story begins in a Wal-Mart bathroom…and that is funny in the making right there! Anyone with kids under three know that this is no small feet. After the turmoil of laying the paper and trying to place Kristin delicately on the seat without the paper falling back into the toilet, it’s now my turn. I know…some of you are not as anal (pardon the pun) in the public toilet areas, but anyone who knows me knows I am freaky about germs. So anyway, I have my daughter perfectly placed in the corner of the bathroom so as not to touch the door handle, the box used for feminine products, or anything else (remember…I’m a germ freak). I’m at the end of that time of the month and had spotted a little on my panty liner. Just as another woman enters the restroom, my daughter spots the lightly soiled liner, and ever so clearly says “Mommy, you pooped your pants!” How do you respond to that one? Do you deny? Do you explain? She was 2 1/2 years old at the time for goodness sake. Of course we have to wait it out for the other person to leave and so we don’t have to face their laughter when we come out. Ugh…after all, I don’t want people to think I really pooped my pants! My own little moral of the story: Leave the kids with Dad when shopping or hold it!